how to turn a man on without touching him

Fortunately, it's usually easy to tell if a guy is turned on. Just look — or feel — for an erection <45>. In some instances, a guy may be turned on mentally but not physically. While most guys experience physical and mental desire simultaneously <24, 46, 47, 48>, known as sexual concordance, these two things are not always in sync. In fact, it's more common for women to experience less concordance than men, and studies have revealed that women's bodies will be aroused when their brains are not and vice versa.

If your man seems to have low desire concordance, the best way to know if he's turned on is simply to ask him.

FAQ #4 – Why don't the typical things turn him on?

While you can usually work from a default sexual script to turn a guy on, this may not always work. Why? Not all men are the same, just like not all women are the same. We all have specific preferences.

Instead of relying on your old fallbacks, take this as a time to get to know your partner and his specific desires and preferences. You might try an activity developed by Masters and Johnson known as sensate focus <49, 50, 51, 52> where you touch his body without intent to make him orgasm <53>, at least, at first. Sensate focus "is commonly used to treat sexual problems such as female anorgasmia, erectile difficulty, and low sexual desire <54>."

Or you could more casually try techniques in this and other articles on the Bad Girls Bible to see what he likes. You could even turn it into a game where he rates what you're doing.

Don't be afraid to ask him what turns him on, either. Talking about this can be great foreplay, and being able to communicate about sex is essential for a good sex life.

Learn how to use sexual communication to have better sex.

FAQ #5 – Will Viagra help to turn him on?

Viagra and similar medications (including Cialis and Levitra <55, 56>) aren't intended to turn a guy on. Viagra helps improve sexual function by increasing blood flow to the penis, so your man will need tofeeldesire for the medicine to work. If he's not aroused, medicine like this won't help.

Furthermore, if he wakes up with an erection (known as morning wood), then he's able to get hard. The problem is something else and may be relationship or psychology related.

Talk to a doctor or perhaps therapist if your man has trouble getting turned on.